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Know your money motivation

What motivates you to save? What moves you to spend? Use these values to make and meet short and long-term financial goals….after all, sometimes it isn’t so much what you earn as it is how you spend it. Don’t believe me? Read this… Oseola McCarty was an African-American woman born in Mississippi in 1908. She never earned a high wage during the decades she spent doing laundry. That’s what makes her gift so surprising. In 1995 just four years before her death, McCarty announced that she would fund a scholarship for financially disadvantaged students attending the University of Southern Mississippi. The fund amount she gifted was $150,000.00. McCarty, an amazing saver with a 6th grade education

Cultivate kindness

A research study involving fourth and fifth grade students in Vancouver, Canada found that cultivating kindness in kids helps them to be more accepting of others, more positive in their outlook and more popular among peers, too. Is this important? Increasingly, yes. Mass murder, bullying and other acts of unkindness have become increasingly common. There isn’t one magic bullet solution, but cultivating empathy, kindness and compassion is almost certainly some part of the answer. Each of these is learned, just as violence is learned. We can choose. Maybe the world isn’t a meaner place. It has been suggested that the 24-hour news cycle only makes us feel it is. But in spite of globalization on

Keep New Year’s Resolutions

We are coming up on another round of New Year’s resolutions. Maybe the annual ritual of hopefulness doesn’t feel so hopeful because it reminds you of all the times you’ve promised to get in shape (save more money or some other goal) – but didn’t. Don’t fret, it is okay to feel hopeful in spite of past failures. This is a brand new year, give yourself a break. Besides, you are unlikely to do better by making yourself feel worse. Instead, forgive yourself for past failures; set small, measurable goals and begin again. You can do this. #startwhereyouare #selfcare #gettingstartedwithexercise #newyearsresolution #intentionsetting

Daring as self care

Don’t be afraid to take a big step if one is indicated. You can’t cross a chasm in two small jumps. David Lloyd George quoted in Do One Thing Everyday That Scares You – A Journal. In other words…go ahead and leap for your dreams. Go for your goals. Throw off the burden of unrealized potential, it is too heavy to carry indefinitely. #doonethingthatscaresyou #daring #personalliberation #DavidLloydGeorge #freeingyourselffromdoubt #intentionsetting #freeingyourselffromfear #leapforyourdreams

Learning how to say no

Why does it feel so hard to say no? Some common reasons are: It makes me feel strong, proud and important when others turn to me. I am afraid of starting a conflict or hurting the other person’s feelings if I say no. I worry that I might lose the relationship if I say no. I am embarrassed to say I don’t have the money if I can’t afford to lend it. I don’t feel like I have the right to refuse. I want to help. I always say yes, I can’t just start saying no now. I feel guilty when I say no. If any of those reasons sounds like you, here are some suggestions for learning to say no. Practice letting yourself feel uncomfortable. Saying yes to someone else only because you feel guilty is a way of sa

Set boundaries for self care

Why are boundaries important for self care? Boundaries are a signal that you are choosing to be deliberate about your plans and goals. When you do not have or honor your boundaries, you risk being pulled in random directions. Boundaries are a way to stand up for yourself. Standing up for yourself can help you feel like you have some control over your life because you get to determine how you will use your resources instead of letting everyone else decide for you. Boundaries can help reduce stress and may even reduce outbursts of anger or frustration that often come with feeling out upon or overwhelmed. A final thought…saying yes to everyone except yourself provides a poor example to others f

Ten things to do with a tax refund

It is nice to splurge when you have a little extra cash. It is important to save, too. Decide to use a portion of your refund to make your financial life a bit more secure. Here are some ideas: Create an emergency fund. Put at least $500 ($1,000 if you can) in an account that you never touch unless there is a dire emergency – as in rent, utilities or repairs on a car you need to get to work. Add something to the fund – even as little as $2.00 every time you get paid. You can also open a retirement account. Start saving with myRA, a retirement savings account from the United States Department of the Treasury. No costs or fees, no complicated investment options, no risk of losing money. Don’t

Self help for self care

About self help Whether you are completing exercises in a workbook, reading the latest self-help book or article, or organizing a peer counseling/support group (may also be called a sister circle), you are engaging in self-help strategies. Self-help is a powerful emotional health tool because it requires an active, ongoing choice to face and work through challenges you are facing. Choosing self-help is like saying to a problem or challenge, I am still in charge of my life. Take Action! Set up your own sister circle Choose 2 or 3 other women and decide together what your circle will be like. Some ideas to discuss: Shared values around confidentiality and trust Meetings (when, how often, where

Support for Self Care

There is no one right way to ask for or get support. The only thing you can do wrong when it comes to support is try to do without it. No matter how strong, smart, talented or resourceful you are, you need the support of others. Even if it has been difficult in the past, don’t be afraid to rely on support. Look for support among friends, co-workers and family. Be careful to choose people that care about you and are emotionally healthy enough to give and receive support. You can also look for support from strangers, such as in a support group. What is a support group? A support group is a gathering of people around a problem, period or theme for the purpose of sharing ideas, encouragement, re

Self-care tips

As promised, eight more self-care tips for protecting your emotional health: Decide that there is no real value in always putting yourself last. In fact, it is important to sometimes put yourself first, even if you are a parent. Know it is okay to expect happiness in your daily life. Look for small pleasures you can be grateful for and relish throughout each day. Rest your mind. Spend time regularly in meditation, prayer or silence. Commit to this practice even if your life is very busy or doing so feels strange. You may even be surprised to find that you feel calmer, more productive and focused. Start simply by taking three or four deep breaths each time you visit the bathroom. Or you might

Protecting your emotional health

We all understand the importance of protecting our physical health by eating a balanced diet, getting regular exercise and adequate rest. What we don’t think about as much is the importance of protecting our emotional health. Taking care of our emotional health is important because our attitudes, how and what we think, play a big part in shaping our experiences, our worldview and even our accomplishments. Just like the food pyramid is designed to help us make the best dietary choices for our physical health, the personal care pyramid helps us make the best choices for our emotional health. The building blocks of the pyramid are self-care, support and self-help. About self-care Much as the wo

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